Relax

I have been working with a new physiotherapist and he has given me a few things to ponder. They relate to a recent journal article about the 10 back pain myths and these are explained in the Empowered Beyond Pain podcast. It certainly has made me stop and think. Mainly about muscle tension. 

Much of my back pain comes from sore and tense muscles around the site of my fusion. It's been like this for 20+ years. But what I am coming to realise is that these muscle aren't just tense they are switched on, permanently. They have been switched on (by me) to protect and brace. Why? Fear mainly. I am scared of movement causing pain so I brace and tense to prevent or avoid it. I also have always thought this way the "right" thing to do. If I am tense and braced then I can be strong and avoid hurting my back. I have built a fort around my spine, protecting it from outside attacks. These muscles are alert soldiers, standing at attention, 'Ready for action, Sir!'

But, there is a problem. I have done this so much, so often, they are switched on ALL THE TIME. Even when they don't need to be and they never, ever get a rest. And this is possibly contributing to the pain. So, for the past few weeks, I have become more aware. I am constantly asking myself if I am tensed up and bracing. Are my muscles switched on? Do they need to be? I've even been given a specific exercise to help train my brain to relax these muscles. 

I have developed a new standing posture - the relaxed posture. Standing doesn't require me to brace everything. Looking in the mirror recently I noticed how tense all my muscles were when I was standing up straight (being a good girl, so I thought!). Everything was firing. So I took a deep breath and as I slowly exhaled, I relaxed. Turned off the glutes, the core muscles, tried to switch off the back (this is still a very hard thing to consciously do) but the transformation was marked. I felt calmer. I looked more relaxed. But, the main thing, there was a decrease in pain. It was a posture I felt I could maintain for much longer than I know I can stand in my normal ramrod straightness. 

So, from now on, I am paying more attention. I am doing away with all the rules I had been taught. I am going to be more relaxed and I am going to be letting my body hang, loosely, lightly. At ease, soldiers.